You keep using that expression, “Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.” I do not think it means what you think it means. (apologies to Inigo Montoya 🙂
You’ve often heard that expression about your own bootstraps, usually regarding self-reliance, rugged individualism, and succeeding without help from others.
That’s not what the expression meant originally.
Back in the days when more people actually wore boots, many of them came with a small strap or tab on each shoe. This was to hold onto for extra leverage when pulling the boots onto your feet.
In the early 19th century, an expression began to circulate about “pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps.” The thing is, this was said with irony and sarcasm. It referred to something that was impossible to do by yourself. Just the opposite of how people use it today.
Think about it…
If you’re standing on the ground with your feet in your boots, try reaching down and pulling on the straps and lifting yourself into the air. Absurd, right? That’s how it was meant to sound.
Another example would be to stand inside of a big bucket, and reach down and try to pick up the bucket, with you in it. Impossible, isn’t it?
Yeah, in the 19th century they used it as a humorous, absurd, and ironic way of describing something you can’t do by yourself.
Somewhere along the way, the expression changed into the opposite meaning. By the 1920s, it was used to describe something you do entirely by yourself, without any help. The expression itself didn’t change, just the meaning assigned to it. And yet, it still sounds absurd when you think about it. I’m not sure why the meaning changed (maybe because people quit wearing boots with straps?).
In real life, initiative and personal responsibility are important, of course. But we have to admit that many of our accomplishments come with the support of others. Either directly or indirectly. It is foolish to think that we live and function independently of community with others.
Those of us in midlife are aware–or ought to be aware–of the gaps in our own abilities and resources. We’ve lived long enough to have experienced the ways things can go badly when we try to go it alone. None of us has all the wisdom and skills to go through life without the support of others.
In my regular job I am part of a particularly effective team.
We are friends as well as colleagues for accomplishing our mission. Each of us brings something unique to the team, and we benefit from the dynamic of this collaborative way of functioning.
We often joke with one another that we are three star players, but together we form a five-star team.
If this is true in a workplace team, it is also true in life. We really do need one another. For most of us, rugged individualism is a guilt-inducing myth. We function better in community with others.
One day, when we’re in the winter of our lives, we’ll realize how much we need support and companionship from others. Don’t wait until then to cultivate these relationships, with family and with friends.
In full disclosure, this is not easy for me, and does not come naturally. When faced with challenges, my tendency is to pull inward and rely on my own resources (ask my team at work). This is partly due to how I was raised. But I consider it something to correct, not a personal strength. I’m working on this, kind of like a spiritual discipline.
I continue to learn–and I hope you do as well–that life is not a solo journey, and we really do need one another–in any season of life.
Some things you can’t do for yourself.
Like pull yourself up by your own bootstraps…
_________________________
For more on the background of this expression, see this article by etymologist and contributing editor of the Oxford English Dictionary, Barry Popik:
https://www.barrypopik.com/index.php/new_york_city/entry/pull_yourself_up_by_your_bootstraps/
See related posts: https://cliffordberger.com/get-better-with-age/
